Same As It Never Was
by screaming-poetically
Summary: Rick and Melinda in 50 sentences. AU following 4.6, "Imaginary Friends and Enemies."


Fandom: Ghost Whisperer  
Pairing: Rick/Melinda  
Title: Same As It Never Was  
Theme set: Epsilon  
Rating: T

**Same As It Never Was**

#22 – Mad

Jim takes up the new hobby of watching Rick and Mel carefully -- he can see plain as day that the professor is in love with his wife, and he can see just as clearly how Melinda is totally oblivious (somehow, that doesn't make him feel less angry.)

#08 – Thousand

After Melinda's near-death experience at the plane crash memorial, Rick realizes that there are a thousand things that he wants to tell her, but only one reason why he can't: Jim.

#39 – Torn

He hugs Melinda closer as her own arms tighten around him, one hand threading through the hair at the nape of his neck, and when she whispers that she misses him already, he's more torn about leaving Grandview than ever before.

#04 – Last

Jim knows why Rick has to go away for a while, he understands and respects it, but he still can't shake the feeling that he'll never see the professor again, even though he promised Mel that he would come back.

#27 – Hide

He thought that by running away to artifacts in the Himalayas that it would make hiding his feelings for Melinda easier, and would perhaps erase them altogether, but the singular fact that he cannot get her out of his head (which translates roughly to "out of his heart") seems to belay that hypothesis.

#33 – Never

Immediately following Jim's death, Melinda feels that she will never be happy again, and she wishes soon after (although, not for the first time) that Rick had never left; she needs him now more than ever.

#25 – Shadow

A shadow surprises her as it turns into the ghost from the archives, and she's suspicious even as the young ghost gives her awkward condolences from the spirits in the underground.

#50 – Believe

"You loved me so well when I was alive, that I don't have any unfinished business; in order for me to cross over, Mel, I need to believe that you're going to be okay – that you'll be happy again," Jim tells her.

#03 – Young

She is young, she reminds herself; she can't believe that this is the end of her heart.

#01 – Motion

In the weeks, months, since Jim has died, Melinda feels that she's just going through the motions and she wants to feel like she has purpose again – she longs for the days when she felt like everything was okay.

#16 – Need

Melinda writes Rick approximately thirty-four letters that she will never send; each and every one of them end with _I need you, please come home_.

#17 – Vision

High up in the Himalayas, Rick has a vision; Jim comes to him and tells him that he needs to go back to Grandview, that Melinda needs him _right now_, and even though he doesn't really understand why or how this has happened, he's on his way back home the very next day.

#37 – Time

After Jim's death, time passes quickly, which is strange because Melinda had thought time would pass slowly, a year to each minute; time only slows down when she sees Rick Payne standing in her doorway, and as he pulls her close to him she can finally breathe again.

#42 – Bother

He starts coming over her house more regularly, and one evening she finds herself looking at him, incredulous – "No, Rick, just… no; you could never be a bother to me, not ever."

#05 – Wrong

It feels wrong somehow to still live in the house that she and Jim built together, the house that they were making a life in, and being there only makes things worse, so when Rick offers to let her move in with him – her and the child, both – she feels her heart swell with love for how he's being, and she's not sure what to make of it.

#20 – Picture

Jim appears to her in the store one day and tells her that, by the way, he has something for Rick in an envelope hidden inside one of his textbooks; when Melinda gives it to the professor, she discovers that what Jim had was a picture of herself and Rick, both of them smiling madly at each other.

#35 – Sudden

Melinda is smoothing his jacket before a tenure meeting when she's suddenly overcome by the urge to kiss him before he heads off to Rockland University, and to her surprise (and, it seems, his as well), after she finishes straightening his tie she leans up and presses a kiss to his mouth.

#02 – Cool

He is in the place between sleep and awake when he feels a cool hand brush across his forehead, followed after a moment by a kiss to the corner of his mouth, and it's only when he hears Melinda whisper _sweet dreams, Rick_ to him that he believes he isn't dreaming.

#30 – Ghost

"This man travelled across the world to be here for you, Mel," Delia says, "and I don't think any number of ghosts could keep him away, whether one of them is Jim or not."

#26 – Goodbye

Melinda is in the back room of Same As It Never Was checking the inventory when Jim appears beside her and tells her that he can cross over now; he can see how happy she is with Rick, how she's healing with him by her side, and even though the tears come, she finds that when she says goodbye to Jim that she feels free.

#24 – Now

He comes home from a meeting, exclaiming loudly in a way that she has grown to find endearing, and she tells him that she crossed Jim over while he was away, and now she's ready for what he has to offer her.

#06 – Gentle

"Love can be gentle, Melinda," Rick says hesitantly, and she smiles softly.

#07 – One

Melinda always thought that Jim was the only one for her, but when she considers Rick and how good he is to her, how good he has always been – she knows that isn't true.

#10 – Learn

"I may not understand you sometimes, or your gift, but I'm learning as I go, Melinda, and I hope to hell that's good enough."

#12 – Wait

She pretends to sleep when Rick comes into the guest bedroom, soon to be come _her_ room, and brushes her hair away with surprising tenderness as he whispers, "I'll wait for you, Melinda; I'll always wait."

#15 – Hold

He holds her hair back as she vomits into the toilet because of her somewhat ferocious morning sickness, whispering into her ear that it will be over soon, and that's exactly what she's afraid of; that one morning she will wake up and Jim will still be dead but Rick still in India, and she will be alone.

#18 – Attention

"I used to love every bit of attention I could get from you, Melinda; I hated that I had to fight for it, even if I hadn't any right to your attention at all," Rick confides in her one night, and she feels like crying as she sidles up close to him on the couch and assures him that he never had to fight for her attention, not ever.

#34 – Sing

It takes a few moments for Rick to wrap his mind around what he's hearing; Melinda is singing to her belly as she sits in his favorite spot on the sofa, one of his sweaters wrapped tight around her, and he can't suppress the thought that this was the way things were supposed to be all along.

#32 – Eye

Delia sidles over to her in the store one day, gives her a knowing glance, and says decidedly, "That Rick Payne is good for you, Mel – don't let him pass you by."

#21 – Fool

"We are all fools in love," Flaherty tells her with surprising stoicism and candor; he gives a nod to Rick and continues, "and that man is a fool for you, always has been."

#23 – Child

She holds her beautiful baby boy in her arms, feeling for the first time since Jim's death that everything that has happened, has happened for a reason; she hears a noise by the door and looks up to meet Rick's sheepish gaze, and she smiles softly, feeling even more sure that there is a reason for all of it.

#19 – Soul

For the first time since the birth she thinks about how the soul of Eric is in her child and she knows that it is important now more than ever that she gives him all the love she ever could.

#13 – Change

Rick rushes out of the house in the morning, but not before grabbing a piece of toast from Melinda's plate and kissing her and her baby on the forehead; she sits in pleasant surprise and is grateful for the change.

#36 – Stop

The first time that Rick kisses Melinda, really kisses her, he has trouble holding back – _stopping _himself – because he's wanted her, this, for so long.

#29 – Safe

"I feel safe with you," Melinda says, "and I don't ever want that to go away."

#31 – Book

Rick's book is finally published and before he leaves the room he tells her, somewhat shyly, to read the dedication page; Melinda flips to it curiously, and finds her eyes welling with tears at the words there – _For Melinda Gordon, who has always known exactly how to show my spirit the way home._

#48 – Precious

Rick tells her that he loves her in typical fashion – he can't stand still, he gestures wildly with his hands, and he has trouble controlling the volume of his voice – and although she responds in kind, she still can't believe that it took this long for her to realize how precious he was to her.

#11 – Blur

She told him once that when you go into the light, you knew things that you didn't know before; Jim thinks that this is true, because what took Rick and Melinda months, maybe even years to realize, seemed only a blur to him.

#14 – Command

"Stay," Melinda commands gently, and when he asks her why, she replies simply, "Tonight, I feel a little bit brave."

#41 – Power

They make love with the power out and candles lit around her bedroom; it's when they're finished and about to fall into slumber that her son wails in the next room, and when Rick stills her movement to get up with a soft kiss and a reassuring caress as he moves to take care of her son – Melinda senses that there's something powerful at work between them.

#28 – Fortune

She lies awake in bed with Rick's arm thrown over her waist protectively, and as she smoothes his hair away from his face, she wonders how she could have such good fortune.

#09 – King

The morning after, Rick feels like the king of the universe.

#44 – Wall

"You really drive me up the wall sometimes, Rick," she says in the heat of an argument over something she can't even remember, and the sudden hurt in his eyes is enough to shame her into immediate apology.

#46 – Drive

"I don't want to drive you away," he says to her some time later, and her hands frame his face as she replies that everything he does, even the silly and annoying things, only drive her closer to him, and frankly, she wouldn't have it any other way.

#38 – Wash

She has taken to washing Rick's clothes along with her own and she finds the ritual so terribly domestic that it almost hurts.

#45 – Naked

His hands move over her naked body with a surety that she didn't even know he possessed, and she sighs with longing.

#40 – History

No one can know history as it actually happened, Rick thinks, and as he reflects on his relationship with Melinda, he comes to believe this is more true than anything.

#49 – Hunger

She never said anything, but she noticed long before Rick left for India the hunger that emerged in his eyes when he looked at her.

#47 – Harm

Her son's first word, as it turns out, is "dada"; it is directed at Rick, and she sees the flash of pleasure in his eyes before it turns to concern as he looks up at her – she smiles and puts her hand on his shoulder, caressing gently as she says "No harm done."

#43 – God

Being skeptical by nature, he doesn't really believe in God, but for him to end up with Melinda, Rick feels that there has to be some truth to a superior being.


End file.
